


We Lived

by SimplyLex



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, F/M, First Kiss, Friendship/Love, Post-Canon, Post-Season/Series 03, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-18
Updated: 2016-07-18
Packaged: 2018-07-24 20:26:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7521976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SimplyLex/pseuds/SimplyLex
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Since the moment she took his hand, asking him to dance with her, Clarke never let go of it. Because once she got used to the feeling of her hand inside Bellamy Blake's, she knew she would never again enjoy dancing without that hand to hold on to. It was a warm feeling of safety, something so rare in that wretched world."</p><p>One-off to get the scene I've had in my mind for a while (i.e. adventure squad getting loose one last time) out of my head. Plus Bellarke can finally have each other, because everything else is lost.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We Lived

**Author's Note:**

> Basically the delinquents having their one last moment of joy before the world ends. Bellamy and Clarke get two moments of joy, because obviously this is Bellarke-heavy.  
> Post-season 3, canon-compliant. Basically my wish/prediction for what could happen in S4.  
> Also, my first fanfic ever.  
> The narration sort of jumps back and forth between Bellamy and Clarke's POVs. It was intentional, but I hope it didn't end up being too confusing.

"So this is it", Jasper said in a quiet, slightly trembling voice, breaking the silence that had been laying in the room for the past minute. "The world... it..."

"It's going to end", Raven finished. "Nothing else we can do. We're all gonna die."

The overwhelming finality of that statement hit all of them like thunder. They did everything they could think of to stop the power plants from exploding, to find shelter from the soon-to-come radiation, to make contact with any other possible survivors for help. None of it worked. For the first time since they landed on the ground, they've lost their battle for survival.

They were gathered in one of Arkadia's meeting rooms, Raven seated comfortably on a sofa due to her disability and chronic pain in her leg, while Jasper, Monty and Harper were occupying seats roud the table. Murphy and Emori were standing in a dark corner like they weren't entirely sure if they truly belonged there. Clarke stood by the window, looking outside at the world that was collapsing as they spoke, with Bellamy by her side, as always.

"So we've failed", Monty said.

"Yeah, it sucks", Raven looked completely defeated. For the first time, her brilliant mind failed to find a miraculous solution to save them.

"What a waste", Jasper's voice was still very quiet, almost too quiet for them to hear. Everyone looked at him unsure of what he meant by that.

"The whole time we've spent here", he started explaining. "We've been fighting for survival against all odds. We've been to hell and back. We've all suffered horrible losses, seen and done horrible things. And for what? So that we could get killed by radiation a few months later? RADIATION of all things? The very thing that was supposed to kill us right away? Well, it should have. I wish the air had been toxic when we first set foot on this godforsaken ground. I wish it had killed us on day one."

Some of them looked surprised by these words, but most of them understood. There was some truth to that. Their entire struggle to live through the grounders, ALIE and the mountain men seemed somewhat pointless now.

Clarke took a glimpse at Bellamy. His features were tense as if he was trying to keep himself from falling apart. She knew how he felt, she knew what he was thinking. They failed, both of them. They were supposed to be the leaders, they were supposed to find a way. They were supposed to save everyone, like they always did. The only thing she was grateful for was that in that final time of humanity, she had him by her side. He was her rock. He was the only person she truly trusted and truly believed in. A thought back on their journey and at where they started made her smile a little. Back then she had no clue what an unbreakable bond would grow between them. Back then, she hated him so much. Funny how it all changed...

"Well, I don't", Harper spoke suddenly, her voice firm and sure. "I don't wish we had died on day one. Yes, we've been through hell. Yes, a lot of awful things happened. But at least we lived guys, we truly lived. What we had up there on the Ark, that was not life, it was existence. Down here, we saw things we could never see up there. We got to walk among the trees. We got to listen to birds, we got to swim in the rivers. Down here, we learned the true value of life, friendship and love. We lived. We danced in the rain. We danced..."

She suddenly stopped speaking and smiled as if she just realized something. She stood up and made her way to where Jasper was seated, still grinning.

"We danced", she repeated slowly, reaching her hand out to him. "So you know what to give me, goggle boy."

Jasper smiled back at her as he understood what she wanted. He reached inside his jacket's pocket and took out Maya's iPod.

Harper smiled back as she took the little device from him and made her way toward the room's set of speakers. She struggled with the technology a bit, so Raven stood up to help her out.

Clarke turned to Bellamy again.

"She's right", she said. That made him look at her for the first time in what felt like forever. She savored the sight of his brown eyes, filled with cares and worries, for just a while, before saying:

"No matter, how or when it ends, we lived."

Something flickered in his eyes for a split second, before sadness took them over again.

"We lived", he repeated, not entirely convinced and not at all consoled.

Meanwhile Raven and Harper finally managed to link the iPod to the Ark's sound system and the room was filled with first notes of what sounded like a piece of classic soft rock.

"Come on, you guys", Harper encouraged, already jumping to the beat of the music. She pulled Monty up from his chair to dance with her. Jasper put his arm around Raven to secure her standing position while she did her best to try and make use of her damaged leg. Murphy studied Emori for a while, apparently waiting for her reaction, before she pulled him closer and started dancing too. That was all the encouragement he needed and in no time he was already spinning her around the room.

Bellamy observed them for a while, thinking that it was probably the first time he ever saw Murphy truly look like the kid he was. Most of the time Bellamy ignored the age difference between himself and the rest of the delinquents, because all of them were forced to grow up so fast. But as he was observing them getting loose in what possibly was their last dance ever, he found himself feeling even worse than before.

Kids. They were just kids and they were going to die.

Then he felt a small hand slipping into one of his.

"Come on", Clarke said, smiling at him. "Dance with us."

She started jumping and dancing in front of him, still holding one of his hands, trying to encourage him to join in. She looked so wonderfully carefree, even if it was just an illusion.

He gave her a faint smile, but didn't move.

"Come on", she repeated, louder now. "Live a little, Blake."

She spun herself around under his arm and pulled him to her a little stronger. Her golden locks were flying through the air as she jumped and turned and finally Bellamy realized that dancing with Clarke Griffin was probably something even better than watching her dance.

Slowly, he started taking over control of the dance and before he noticed, he was leading her and spinning her around the room as she giggled adorably. At one point, he pulled her toward himself a little stronger than he intended and she ended up bumping into him, into a semi-embrace. Being so close to each other stopped their momentum and they lost the beat of the music. Neither of them cared, though.

Bellamy's hand was on her waist now and hers was on his shoulder. Their other hands were still joined. Since the moment she took his hand, asking him to dance with her, Clarke never let go of it. Because once she got used to the feeling of her hand inside Bellamy Blake's, she knew she would never again enjoy dancing without that hand to hold on to. It was a warm feeling of safety, something so rare in that wretched world.

She decided to use that moment of unexpected closeness and look into his eyes to check whether that overwhelming sadness was still there.

Some of it was. She understood it was because of Octavia. He seemed moderately fine with her leaving as long as he had a mission and as long as there still was hope for the world to be saved. Clarke knew that he wanted to see his little sister one last time before they all died, but Octavia left with Indra and was nowhere to be found. The heartbreak of possibly having lost her forever was apparent on his face and in his eyes. There was nothing Clarke could do to fix this. But she could do something else.

"There's a bottle of whisky in my room with our name on it", she whispered. She noticed that her voice sounded rather weak. Somehow being so close to him made it difficult to speak. Or breathe.

"Wanna go grab that drink?", she asked louder now, forcing herself to regain her composure.

"About time", he answered.

 

***

 

"Here you go", Clarke said five minutes later, handing Bellamy a cup full of alcohol.

He looked at it slightly suspiciously and asked:

"How in the hell did you get your hands on a bottle of whisky?"

"My mom brought it from one of her medical supply trips to Mount Weather. She wanted me to drink it on my twenty-first birthday, but given the circumstances..."

She only shrugged at that, but the realization that she wouldn't live to be twenty-one broke Bellamy's heart. She wouldn't even live to be twenty. She was going to die a teenager, like so many others...

"Clarke... "

"Shhh, it's okay. I don't want to get all depressed, I want to drink. So... bottoms up."

She clinked their cups, encouraging him to drink. He took a sip of his whisky, enjoying the taste, but Clarke practically emptied her cup at one go.

"Whoa, you're really going for it", Bellamy noticed.

"You bet I am", she replied. "And you're going to go for it with me."

He took another sip as she turned around to refill her empty cup.

"It's kind of funny, you know", she said, as she was standing by the table, her back to him. "Our story, I mean. We started as enemies."

She turned back to look at him before she said:

"I hated your guts back then."

That made him smirk adorably, a sight so rare these days or... ever.

"Right back at you", he said, leaning forward a little. "Princess."

The sound of that old nickname made her smile too and she breathed out a tiny laugh.

"Yeah. But then I started to respect and trust you. We became partners, then friends. You are the best friend I could ever ask for, Bellamy."

Suddenly something changed in his expression.

"A friend", he said with a shade of annoyance in his voice. He took a few steps toward her so that now they were standing face to face next to the table, inches away from each other.

"You have long been more than just a friend to me, Clarke."

That's what _she_ wanted to say. She wasn't done yet, but he was the one speaking now and she hoped he was saying what she thought he was. It wasn't easy with Bellamy. While on one hand he was a man whose feelings drove him, on the other he was awful at talking about them. It was always his actions that spoke, not his words.

"Ever since you came back to Camp Jaha from Mount Weather", he continued meanwhile. "And especially after you killed Finn to save the rest of us, I knew I could do anything for you. Everything", he said in a low, hoarse voice that hit all the right strings in her. "I could shoot myself in the head right here and now if you asked me to. I could murder an entire army of grounders for you, which I pretty much did anyway."

That took her slightly by surprise. She knew she'd hurt him by leaving, she knew she'd hurt him even more by staying in Polis, but she didn't fully realize the effect it had on him.

"I know people think I lost it because of Gina", he continued. "But the truth is, it wasn't losing her that pushed me off the edge. It was losing you. Watching you choose the grounders over us... watching you choose... Lexa... over..."

He couldn't say it, but she knew anyway.

"I'm so sorry I hurt you so much...", she started, because apology was all she could give him and forgiveness was all she could ask for from him.

"Stop", he interrupted immediately. "I'm not saying this to make you feel sorry. I'm saying this because I need you to know. I..."

His voice broke, he was searching for words to express himself, afraid of saying the ones he wanted to say for fear of scaring her. But once again, she knew anyway.

"I know", she said as she took his hand. He wasn't looking into her eyes so she leaned forward to make him. Then, with his eyes finally fixed on hers, she repeated slowly:

"I know."

It was mesmerizing to watch as something changed in his eyes at those words.

She was still holding his left hand, so he used his right one to brush a strand of hair from her face. That beautiful, fierce face that meant the world to him. The face he saw in his dreams, the face he dreamt of when he was awake. The only face in that world, besides Octavia's, the loss of which he could never handle. He had been hers for so long. It was time to stop holding back, to stop pretending and to just... live, for once, just truly live.

Gently, he cupped her cheek with his fingers, making his way toward her chin. He lifted it up a little, because she was so much smaller than him, and started to lean down.

She met him half way. Their lips touched slowly, gently at first, as if both of them were testing the feeling. Then, all of the wait and anticipation, all of the hunger and longing that he'd been feeling for so long got the best of Bellamy and he pressed harder, savoring the taste of her. _Finally._

All Clarke could feel in that moment was love. It felt so RIGHT. It was different than what it felt like with Finn or Lexa. It wasn't a sudden teenage crush, it wasn't a passionate fascination. It was love, in its purest, deepest form. He tasted like love. And like Earth, and like freedom.

She had loved Bellamy for a long time, but she always told herself it was entirely platonic. She didn't want to love him in _that_ way, because that pretty much meant death sentence for him. Everyone she let herself care about romantically ended up dead. She didn't want that to happen to him, not him. She couldn't have that happen. So she shoved her feelings deep inside her, always finding missions to complete, people to save, tasks to fulfill. For the most part, it worked. But now, as they were literally standing at the end of days, none of it mattered. They were both going to die anyway. So she could finally have Bellamy to herself. All of him.

In that moment and in that place, with the world falling apart around them, with Bellamy's arms wrapped around her and his lips on hers, for the first time in her life, Clarke felt home. Truly home.

**Author's Note:**

> English is not my mother tongue, so please excuse errors and simple vocabulary.


End file.
